When your wrong...your wrong....

So it is fitting that I write this blog on this day.  You may have noticed I haven't blogged in a couple of weeks.  I've been in a time of reflection, and last weekend I spent a wonderful weekend with my wife.  Just me and her and no agenda for the weekend.  Sometimes you just gotta have weekends like that.  However, the weekend before I had called my Dad.  The usual small talk, you know, it's hot here, it's cool up there.  And then he asked if I'd gotten his email.  He was writing me to tell me about a book I'd read, and his views on why he'd stopped reading it. 

Well, I got to read the email (my phone was having issues), then was able to call him back and really get some meat.  It literally rocked my world.  Philippians 1:12-18 is specifically what we discussed.  It had to do with the book, Christianity in Crisis, and my father was able to give me a completely different view, through this passage.  And it got me to thinking.  So I began to research the Bible.  A passage in Mark, and even in I Corinthians spoke on something called Sectarianism.  And I'd been practicing it. 

Yeah, it's a sin according to the Bible.  As I reflected I'd had some really, really bad experiences at a certain ministry and I was holding resentments.  The perfect storm began when Ginger was told she had demons because she was bipolar.  It brought up thoughts of this ministry and began fueling the storm.  I was on a mission to tear down ministries that preached such things.  Then I read the book, and the storm developed, and I was ready to go, quite literally, viral.  I was on board.  I was locked and loaded.  But somehow every time I wanted to lash out, something held me back, at least on Facebook.  Don't get me wrong, I vented on my blog, but I wanted to lash out.  Ever heard the saying, hurt people hurt people?  That was me. 

But in the passage that Dad sent me, the Apostle Paul was being attacked by believers with selfish motives.  Yet, instead of lashing out at them, he was thankful, yes THANKFUL because at least they were preaching Christ.  And in that moment of clarity with my Dad, I realized some things about myself.  I'd been looking down on those who followed those the book criticized.  I prided myself on loving those of different denominations (yes, there is that word pride), but when it came to THOSE PEOPLE I found a bitterness I didn't really realize had embedded itself in my heart. 

Look, I've told you all who read this blog I'm honest here.  I realize this doesn't make me look very pretty, but as Ginger will say, God had to do surgery on my heart, and Dad, MY Dad, was used by God to help me look at it.  I'm not condoning what these people believe by any stretch, however, I was even beginning to look at Christian songs and wonder, well, what do the artists believe, because if they believe this stuff, I don't want to listen to that.  This coming from someone who loves heavy metal. 

So I took a couple of weeks to let God work on my heart.  I'm happy to say that I look at things quite a bit different now.  Jesus was about loving people, showing them salvation.  I am a disciple of Christ and should mimic that love.  We are to work out our own salvation through Christ.  As Dad said, they can reach people others can't.  And even if they are preaching selfishly, they are still preaching Christ.  I'm not going to say that I have all the answers to this, and I'm still figuring it all out in my heart.  But that ministry I had such a hard time with, well, things are different now.  So they are different than me.  I know, deep down, they love God.  They worship different, even interpret things a bit different, but you know what, they have a sincerity in what they do. 

Ginger deals with hyperreligosity and in a sense, I was too.  You know, I know the truth and if you don't follow exactly how I think you should, then you are wrong.  Ginger's however is psychosis, mine is with a clear mind.   The good news is, having come to terms with this, I've been able to help Ginger.  God never wastes a hurt.  And now I listen to Christian music and I don't worry about the artist, I just enjoy praising God through the song.  I'm not perfect, I have views that may seem controversial, especially in music, but I follow God to the best of my ability.  I fail, I make mistakes, and God understands, and does His best to guide me in the path I need to go.  Along the way God uses people, like my Dad.  So when I say, to me, I have the best Dad in the world, it is my opinion, now you get a glimpse as to why.  No, he's not perfect, but that doesn't prevent me from looking up to him and hoping when I'm his age I have half the wisdom he does.

Baa

P.S.  I got my haircut!!!!

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