Something to Ponder

Yeah, it hasn't been a week and I'm posting again, can you believe it! Thank you for your wonderful comments!

Last night Ginger gave her testimony at Celebrate Recovery. It has been 3 years since she's given it. I got to hear it 3 years ago, it was when Ginger and I were first starting to get to know each other. Wow, did we ever not know each other? We got to reflect upon those wonderful times at the beginning, the butterflies, the anticipation on seeing each other during the week. One of our favorite things to reflect on is how I got Ginger's phone number.

Her friend Paige had been trying to get me to get her number for a few weeks. She thought we'd be perfect together. Me, I was praying to God. I mean I thought she was beautiful, but you have to understand my track record with relationships and I wasn't suppose to be dating in the ministry I was at, not CR by the way (and that is another story in itself). Sometimes we ask God to make the path clear to us, show us a sign kinda thing. Well, it wasn't exactly a sign, or maybe it was, but Ginger was sitting next to me at the greeter's table and a friend of her's asked her for her phone number. Did Ginger write it down, no, she blurts it out, and I found myself memorizing it. Over and over I said it in my mind till I had it in my head (I could have written it down if I'd of thought about it). Then, after the small groups I put it in my phone and texted her, Is this your number, Paul. The rest, as they say, is history.

Ginger has grown tremendously. She has an incredible faith and love for God that astounds me. For someone who struggles with bipolar and anxiety, you'd never know it. She doesn't complain, though in our private moments she has questioned why at times, but ends up giving it to God as her thorn. She values her sound mind more than just about anything and we are both thankful that she has been stable for several years. God has done mighty works through her just in my life and we are both soooo thankful for each other. Ginger often says, What would I do without you? My answer, you wouldn't laugh as much! She gets to see a side of me few do, guard down, defenses down, and being my goofy self. Which is how it should be right? My wife is my best friend and we can laugh, joke, cry, and have moments that are reserved just for each other. I'm amazed as I look into those beautiful hazel eyes and see the woman of my dreams. And God made her for me.

Which leads me into my relationship with God, for which I am thankful. I'm the same way with God now, and Ginger has helped me so much with this. I don't have to come to God all perfect and with my act together. There are times I'm sad and let God know, I get angry and let God know, and I share happy moments with God. God isn't some distant being that I have to fear lightning bolts coming down if I stumble. God is right there with me, picking me up if I do and in a loving gentle way, telling me a better way to live. Most times, as I ask God to guide me in a decision, He does, from simple things like, should I make this purchase? To which way should I go to work. Sometimes He prompts me to read His Word, or to call Ginger, He will guide your life if you let Him. Don't get me wrong, I can take the rein's back, but usually I start messing things up and I give them back. I mean, if I have a hard time delegating 5 people, how about 5 billion? Nah, don't need God's job, I mean, can you imagine herding 5 billion sheep?

Sometimes, when following God, we have to put our own desires aside to do His. Isn't that the sacrifice? Isn't that when your faith is tested? When you have to put your own desires aside because God has a higher purpose for you? It can be a challenge. But when you see it, when He gives you a glimpse and you realize that God is at work, it can be an awesome feeling. I've heard it preached that you will not always have a peace when God tells you to do something. I tend to disagree because I've always had a peace in my spirit when I've followed God's direction. Now my flesh may argue, but that is where we must tame the flesh. I'm working out my own salvation, and God is teaching me so much. The place, however, that I see God more clearly than any though, it in my wife's eyes. She has a look, you know, a LOOK. That I love you look that is so much more than that, and it is as if Jesus is staring through her at me. It is a glimpse of my Savior's love, and in those moments I'm prone to tear up just a bit, because it doesn't matter what is going on, with that look, everything is at peace. Someone once told us the magic will fade after a year of knowing each other. Well, it has been 3, almost 1 married, and that magic, well, it has only gotten stronger. I know the meaning of a soulmate now, of a missing rib, of having a true love, for I've found mine, and the secret, you may ask, well, it is because Jesus is in her....


Popular Posts