Week 25: Anxiety

Paul and Sophie

So Ginger and I were on a walk yesterday and Sophie, who most of the time makes the whole trip (and runs at times), did what we called bear rugging.  She lays down with her legs spread out as if to say I am done.  Well we still had half the trip to make and so I picked her up and through her around my neck.  Surprisingly she didn't mind whatsoever and so watched everything from her perch as we made our way home.  And I just thought it would make a cute picture.  Sure enough, after everything was set up, Sophie had no problem going over my neck and when she laid her little head down that was the shot.  Though I made the shot black and white, thought I'd make my colorful watch stand out just because it is, well, colorful.

So I wanted to take some time in my blog to talk about Ginger and her anxiety.  For those that don't know, Ginger suffers from bipolar and anxiety.  She is stable and does a remarkable job in navigating through life.  Her anxiety can, at times, be overwhelming.  She has medicine she takes, and it helps, as well as her faith.  But in the throes of anxiety her faith can waver, which is where those who love her come into play.  She tells me at times she hangs onto my faith because she has none at the time. 

So she got a new job.  A very exciting time and an answer to prayer.  But her Monday's are still difficult.  I knew when she got the new job there would be bumps.  For her, there was the relief of a new job. For me, I knew we had a couple of months of ups and downs.   With learning new challenges comes the fear of making mistakes.  In fact, for Ginger, she is less scared of death than of making mistakes, it terrifies her to the point of paralysis.  She does not like asking a lot of questions and has a streak of perfectionism in her.  So Tuesday through Friday, everything is great, learning is fun, and she loves her new job and has no problem asking questions.  On Saturday the worrying begins of an anxiety attack during work on Monday.  The good news, the anxiety attacks have been moving back.  This last Monday they didn't start till 3pm.  When she first started they were almost all day.  As soon as we get a "good" Monday, the fear will subside on the weekends.  I do expect that time will come soon.

In case your wondering, at her old job she had anxiety attacks not only on Monday but on just about every day of the week if special projects came up.  Again, the fear of making mistakes but in that instance it was how her boss treated her when she asked questions that shot the anxiety up.

So for now, weekends are a time in which I do my best to help Ginger navigate through the days to Monday.  Sleep is a welcome relief and she has no problem, because of her meds, going to sleep.  When the good times are here on the weekends we definitely take time to cherish them.  When the mood goes down, I am there is talk, or rub her hands, or play with her hair.  It calms her.  I take her to places she enjoys going to so she can check out for a little while. 

Ginger feels that she is alone in her anxiety when she is in the middle of it.  She has gotten online to try and join a support group of those that suffer from anxiety.  But here is where I ask a favor dear reader.  If you have come to this blog through Facebook, I have a favor to ask.  In the comments section of Facebook if you yourself or someone you know has suffered from anxiety, could you just let her know.  If not, could you comment some encouragement.  Because I will publish this this afternoon she will get the comments through the day today and tomorrow.  On Monday, pray for her, send her a text or email of support, basically shower her with love, encouragement, and hope.  I know that God will use many of you to help her.  I thank you in advance for your prayers, encouragement, and support.

Baa

P.S.  Next week I will update everyone on how it went.