Week 18: Of Sunlight and Bipolar

So I was up early this morning.  Usually our little fur baby gets me up by licking my face, as if to say, Daddy it is time to get up!  (Yep I am the Daddy).  Of course right now as I write this she is sleeping on my lap, head on my arm, snoring.  It is moments like these that make my heart melt. 

So I have the darkening curtains opened this morning to let the sunlight in.  Funny, there was a time that I hated the sun.  Summer made me depressed and truly I just wanted the night to come.  Don't get me wrong, still love nighttime, but I am beginning to enjoy the feeling of sunlight on my face again.  Why did I hate the sun?  Goes back to my addiction. But I love taking pictures in the morning light.  They call it the Golden Hour when the sun is beginning to rise.  So even though our little fur baby is getting me up early, I was anxious to see if we had cloud cover or not.  Because with where our little home sits we get the morning sun beaming in (and the neighbors cut down a big tree so we get more morning sun).  Sure enough the sun was just about to rise so I was able to get my camera.  I had spied a few spots where I thought I might get a good picture but the one above was a complete surprise.  The stone in front of the Bible says Believe in Yourself, a gift from Teddy and Asia.  This is Ginger's little study area.  It is where she goes to get into the Word, to find comfort in Him. 

This next shot I had seen earlier in the week but had to go to work.  So I filed it away in the back of my mind till I could get another sunny morning.

This is on our shelves.  Not much of it has changed, it is our engagement and wedding announcement, some of our favorite pictures of each other and the ring box that I used to propose to Ginger to at Rebecca's cabin on Christmas Day so many years ago (the note is still inside).  And just as the light shines on these memories, so does God shine on our marriage.  I love the almost orange glow of the sun in this picture, it is what attracted me to it in the first place. 

So yesterday while I was at work, Ginger went to take her medicine.  We have it in a pill container so she knows to take it in the morning and evening.  She has a habit of getting up, eating breakfast, and then crawling back into bed for a few minutes.  Well, when she got up this second time she only saw one pill in the Saturday morning container.  Thinking she had spilled the pills out earlier, she got confused having not remembered taking them, so decided to take Sunday mornings because, well, she did not remember taking them.  So a little bipolar primer.  Ginger's short term memory is not very good.  Believe it or not she remembers dates of people birthday's from 30 years ago, which makes her exceptionally smart.  But I tend to be her short term memory.  So what happened was, she doubled her medication, except for the one lone pill.   And it played havoc with her mind.  By the time I got home she was out but came back in and was not doing very well.  At this point her mind was beginning to race.  She'd had some coffee, which did not help the situation.  She took some of her anxiety meds and began to feel better.  We went out to eat and she had tea with her dinner (which has caffeine).  By the time we got home her brain was beginning to, what we call, be on fire.  She took some more meds but she also needed sleep to reset her brain.  Have you ever tried to sleep with a brain that has racing thoughts?  Well just watch Forged by Fire (which bores Ginger to tears) and when the anxiety meds finally kicked in she was able to sleep (and I got to watch a Khopesh be made, fyi it is a sword).  It is exactly what she needed.  We had a birthday to go to but when Ginger is sick, social interaction is almost impossible.  Ginger woke up later, feeling a little better, but soon after we went to bed.

So this morning I let her sleep.  Doubling up on her meds from yesterday, the best thing for her after the trauma of her brain being on fire is to let it rest.  So after my little photo session, Sophie and I began to clean, and clean we did!  Sophie loves dust bunnies...   Usually Ginger does the cleaning, but the only thing I wanted her to do today is relax and limit social interaction.  She finds comfort in her Sunday routine so I did not want to risk changing things too much today lest she relapse back into brain on fire mode.  We had a social interaction to go to this afternoon as well, but as her doctor says, better is the enemy of good.  In other words, I know what helps Ginger come back from these moments and her routine, well, breaking it might send her back into anxiety because Sunday's can be hard.  So better to stay with the routine.  As it is the next day after a brain on fire incident she is a little shaky and scared it will come back.  It is a scary place for her, the rapid cycling, the depression that saps the hope that she has.  In the pit she cannot see God or wonders where God is.  God uses her friends and I to help her see Him.  And it turns things that are joyous into things of anxiety.  Because Ginger has big news on the job front.....

On May 14th, with the same company, she begins working as an Office Assistant at the Lindale Office!  We have kept it pretty hush hush up until now.  Ginger is very excited and gets a raise!  We prayed that God close all doors but the one that needed to be open and after over a year of closed doors, this one opened.  Of course, in light of what happened yesterday, she is still a bit anxious about the change.  We both have tremendous peace over this job change, but any change for either her or I can be difficult.  Your prayers are appreciated.

So speaking of new beginnings I was working at a house this last week and spied some movement.  As I carry my camera, everywhere, I had to get this shot.  I actually only had time for two shots before I was noticed and they flew away (there are two in there).

News about me personally.  I have been working on my studio, putting up some LED lights.  Don't want to reveal too much till I am done but I should have pictures next week (Nathan and Kayla already know, the green hue of light coming out of the studio gave it away..).  And my phone has been acting crazy lately.  Seems texts are working good, but phone calls have been sporatic, if I have gotten them at all.  So if anyone has been trying to get a hold of me and I have not answered you, that is why.  Since most of my good friends and family read this, it is the best way for me to let you know.

Continue to keep Ginger and I in your prayers.  There will be lots of Hallmark movies playing in the Peterson household this afternoon and tonight, thank goodness for Hallmark (and a tablet for Paul!).  And I do believe Sophie wants to take us for a walk.....

Baa

P.S.  Not only can Sophie jump on the couch now, but on Friday she was able to jump on the bed with her stool.  Oh yes, our little fur baby is growing up!